Fear is excitement without the breath. *Fritz Perls
Our human condition has always provided lots of exciting situations. We live in a time and age with more excitement than ever before...and that excitement is almost always utterly disconnected from our survival. Look at this! Buy that! Virtually imagine this! Most of the time these things seem very positive, especially in the short-term. We have bodies and brains that love excitement...until we don't. Our kids and peace of mind are on the front lines of this anxiety-inducing version of reality that we create for ourselves. It looks like this excitement is causing a LOT of collective anxiety, especially for our kids. As a big, loving person in kids' lives, the question becomes, "What simple steps can help our kids navigate excitement and the situations of life?"
When we have time and space to look at our path as parent or teacher or with any of the people and situations in our lives, our actions may be far more skillful when we stick to a very simple approach. Skillful action seems much more likely, especially with our kids, when we:
1)accept reality as it presents itself (It's like THIS--not what should/could/would be);
2)find maximum faith in the person(s) facing the situation, especially in myself!;
3)exercise courageous (brutal?!) honesty about who truly owns a given situation or problem; and,
4)ask that person, "What do you think you can do?" and then step the heck back in the short-term
When we do this with our kids in situations ranging from the banal to significant, we send a profound message of confidence and trust that are the best hope we have to offer our kids. Every time we do this we become part of the solution for our kids. Granted, situations and individual kids are different, but the sooner I can do this, the sooner our kid is another step or two closer to being ready for the real world...with all its excitement!